37 - Symptoms of Codependency (Part 3)
The Boy & The Ogre: Finding Freedom from Codependency by Chip Dodd
In codependency, people hide their competence and giftings in order to belong and matter.
People are generally unable to celebrate well with others.
6. Name the symptom
Enmeshed relationships with controlling people
Identify the fear that it’s grounded in
Fear of being alone
Identify the toxic shame that it is birthed in
Unless I please, I will be rejected.
Discuss its impaired expression in our lives (External locus of control)
I wait to see what they want before I can act, and even then, I am uncertain about my feelings and thoughts.
Discuss what it was meant to be (Internal locus of control)
Being in relationship with people who see you as having the same worth, and desire to hear your feelings and thoughts.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14
7. Name the symptom
Constricted emotions
Identify the fear that it’s grounded in
Fear of being known or the fear of being seen as weak/inadequate
Identify the toxic shame that it is birthed in
If I let myself be known, bad consequences will happen. The past will repeat itself. I will be seen as weak/ inadequate again.
Discuss its impaired expression in our lives (External locus of control)
The need to hide or deny feelings, needs, desire, longings, and hope.
Discuss what it was meant to be (Internal locus of control)
Freedom to express yourself wisely with others who can do the same
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8